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The Self-Acceptance Project

  What if you really are perfectly fine just as you are?  Hang on…what? Could it be that you are completely acceptable without losing the last 5 kilos; or improving your downward dog; or getting a promotion; or becoming more mindful; or curbing your impatient nature; or driving a faster car; or going paleo; or perfecting your serve; or finding…

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What if you awoke tomorrow with only the things you are grateful for today?

            I have shouted the benefits of gratitude from the rooftops previously, and when I saw a version of this line about gratitude embedded in a recent post by Marc and Angel Hack Life (www.marcandangel.com), it really struck me afresh. Problems can reverberate and echo through our lives like music carrying on long after the orchestra…

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What Kind of Tool Are You?

The doctor said to me one day in therapy that he was angry with himself for being so reticent, so shy at parties.  He watched other single men holding court, while he was relegated to the background, never sharing the spotlight.  He felt like a faded wallflower.  He felt hopeless about ever attracting a woman to love him. He did…

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Tell Someone Who Cares

I heard this statement recently, beautiful in its simplicity: When healthy people have something to say, they say it to you.  When an unhealthy person has a problem with you, they tell someone else! Confession time!  Ever been an ‘unhealthy person’?  I never have of course…much!  Just as we are all guilty of the odd junk food fix, most of…

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The Fast Freeway to Happiness: Gratitude

Such a beautifully simple method for happiness!  Such compelling robust research evidence to show that it actually works.  Resisting would indeed be bloody-minded.  And yet…trouble is, everywhere you look there are gratitude pushers.  Engraving the word on rocks, putting it on billboards, there are even several versions in clip art for goodness sake! Then somehow gratitude starts to become devoid…

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Out and Proud (of who we are)

Watching the two young men kiss lovingly on the sidewalk as they took their reluctant leave from one another gave me a small shock as I zoomed past in the taxi launching itself through the hilly streets of San Francisco. Not because I was homophobic…surely? Actually, I wasn’t really surprised to see men kiss, since I was in the Castro…

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You Were Lucky! (Or how gratitude needs to come from within)

‘You were lucky to live in the bottom of a lake! There were 150 of us living in a shoebox in the middle of the road…we dreamed of living in a lake!’ …Monty Python ‘Four Yorkshiremen’   This famed Monty Python skit shows four men having a discussion about their childhoods, culminating in what amounts to a contest about who…

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Grieving Bali style: Beat the drum and beat it loud!

I went back to Nusa Lembongan, a very small and desirable Indonesian island, where we run our retreats. I expected coconut trees, fighting cocks, turquoise waters, the odd cocktail, and yes, a bit of local culture. I did not expect to be attending a funeral. And yet, there was my man, looking uncomfortable in the required traditional sarong outifit, attempting to…

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Creatures of Connection

A new injury kept me put of the ocean and away from my private practice clients not to mention causing a cessation of yoga, walks in the national park, and the occasional dance.  My mood was unaccountably flat.  I put it down to lack of endorphins and worry about what might happen. Finally sick of myself, I hauled myself down…

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Random acts of … Lubricant for this old heart?

I love it when I can have an anti-whinge.  There are so many things in life that make us want to ‘roll the rock in front of the cave’ and never come out…tax bills, road ragers, bullies, and bad TV.  And yet, this week I was enticed out from the stony hole because I was struck by the kindness of…

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